Spencer and Toby - 5x01
by TobyandSpencer
Summary: Spencer misses Toby, and she can't take it anymore with all the stress...


With Toby gone, I felt completely alone. Dean had made up some of the lonley feelings I had. But, now that Toby was gone, and Dean, things felt different.  
I couldn't but have the feeling of loss.  
After yesterday...

Ezra had been shot. He knew who -A was, but now, he may not even survive. Alison was being questioned by the police. The cops had found her, and Alison proved that I didn't hurt anyone, so I had gone home. Aria was still with Ezra at the hospital, she was worried sick about him. She was sobbing the whole drive there, and I had tried everything I could to calm her down. But she was unsteady, and anxious.  
I had gone home, and ran to my room, away from the reporters. My parents had to stay with Melissa at the police station for more questioning. The police let me go home, sympathy taking over.

I had no idea where Toby was now, I only knew that he was in London to bring back Melissa. I had missed Melissa, but I needed Toby even more. I missed him. I needed him. Just the thought of him being away brought a cold chill through my heart. I lied on my bed, and felt a sob come through my chest, and out my mouth. I layed on my side, and shut my eyes, letting out a small moan. I was thinking of Toby's arms around me, how he kissed me...

And how he wasn't even here.

I couldn't bare the many feeling welling up inside of me. I had to get them out, or they would kill me.  
I wouldn't let -A hurt me! We were so close to knowing who they were.  
Hanna had aimed the gun at -A. We demanded them to take off the mask. But when we did, -A jumped off the roof, and grabbed the ledge of the next building. We didn't know who -A was. But -A was not Mrs. D. There was no way. Mrs. D had buried Alison alive, she was protecting who ever had hit Alison with a rock. Alison knew Mrs. D buried her alive.

I was so pissed! We were so close, and we let -A slip from our fingertips. God dammit! I couldn't take this anymore!

I ran over to my door, and slammed it shut.

My parents were gone, so I had time.

I had a hidden stash of ADHD pills, and I pulled them out from my pillow case. I placed eight in my hand...  
And I brought them to my mouth. I swallowed them, one by one, sobbing, thinking of the girls, and Toby. The container for the pills dropped to the floor, and I fell backwards on my bed.

I couldn't take this anymore, it was too much, and I was one person, I could only handle so much. This was the end. To my life. To the torture that had been with me for years.

I lied on my back on the bed, my heart beating fast. I was losing my vision. Just then, there was a knock on the door. Then it burst open, and I heard a loud gasp.

It was him. It was him. It was Toby.

He was wearing a gray button up shirt, jeans, his hair a new-fresh-cut. His blue eyes widened in fear.

I looked away ever so slightly, and breathed out.

Toby kneeled over me, and then picked up the bottle that was now empty.  
"No! Spencer!"

He cried out, and he picked me up in his arms, and brought me close to his chest. His leather jacket cradled me, and I smelt his familiar lavender/leather scent.

I closed my eyes.  
Toby was running down the stairs, and I could feel the reporters eyes watching from the windows. Toby raced through the door, and the people gasped.

"Call 911! Please, someone!" Toby yelped. I heard a girl reporter yell,

"I will!"  
And then Toby sat on the ground, arms around me, his head lying on top of mine. I felt sweat beat off my head.

"Stay with me, Spencer... look at me"  
I looked up at him, and let out a shaky breath.  
"I'm... sorry..." I choked out, and shook in cold.

Toby pulled his jacket off, and placed it over me as a blanket. The reporters backed off, their cameras not making a sound. Toby then cried.

His tears rolled down his cheeks.

Then, I heard the noise of an ambulance truck, and I groaned in pain. Toby lifted me up, and rushed me over to the ambulance truck that was parked outside of the gates to my house.

"She overdosed..." Toby told them. I felt him lower me on a stretcher, and the ambulance, inserted a needle in my arm, injecting me with something.

"Do you know what kind of pill?"  
"ADHD pills" Toby replied.  
"We'll take her to the hospital"  
Toby squeezed my hand, and I felt the ambulance roll me away, lifting me into the truck.

I opened my eyes to a blinding light, and couldn't see Toby.

But he had saved me. He was back. But for some reason, I felt even more empty. Maybe it was the pills, or maybe, it was just I didn't want to live.

I arrived at the hospital, and they knocked me out. I couldn't remember much, just alot of screaming, and I even remember hearing Aria scream at the sight of me. I heard her yell my name, she was probably still here for Ezra. I didn't open my eyes as they rolled me to another room.  
And I fell into darkness.

I woke up, uncomfortable sheets surrounding my weak body.  
I moaned, the pain still in my head.  
I felt a hand touch my forehead, resting there.  
I fluttered open my eyes, and there he was.  
"Toby...?" I croaked out.

"Spencer..." He said miserably.  
"I'm... I'm so s"-  
"Don't Spence..." He replied, looking down.

"I'm the one who's sorry"

"Why?"  
"I left you. I shouldn't have... You could've... you could've died"  
"I know..."  
"Why... why did you...?"  
"I'm sorry, it's just..." I let out a sob.  
"I'm so stressed. I didn't have you... I didn't have my friends... -A would've killed us... I just couldn't take the stress any longer..."  
"Spencer... please... promise me you won't ever do that agian..." Toby looked at me, his eyes puffy from tears.  
"I promise"  
Toby leaned over and kissed my forward lightly.

"I can't lose you... I love you Spencer Hastings"

I pulled his head down to kiss me, and I kissed him hard, passionaltey.  
"I love you too"


End file.
